We work, we plan, we pray, we play, and then…BOOM! just like that, life changes. You don’t foresee it. Never planned for it. And certainly have no real idea what to do with it. You just receive it from the hand of God. That’s where we are at right now.
Our troubles are light and momentary. My husband and I really believe that. Which makes hardship bearable, but not pleasant. It makes you hopeful because the One whose hand dealt it out, is a good hand – a trustworthy hand that our names are written on. So we rest or at least strive to rest.
My husband was pretty healthy (rarely got sick and had no known diseases), hard-working, leading, teaching, and doing. Then BOOM! just like that he’s in the hospital with so many things wrong with him the doctors don’t know what to do.
He gets out after 8 days with a pharmacy full of meds to live and a life vest on to make sure if he goes into sudden cardiac death that he has a chance to be revived so we can make it to the hospital. We thought life would return back to it’s normal rhythm quickly. Then BOOM! just like that his eyesight gets worse (from strokes and diabetes), we see he cannot drive for long periods of time (his job), he can’t look at a computer screen for long periods of time (computer guy by trade), and he can only do so much before being completely exhausted.
What is the next step?
Frankly, we do not know for certain. So we take it one day at a time, praying, planning, and working on what we can moment by moment, coming to God for what we need.
As I was thinking today about our family, church ministry, and neighborhood ministry, it is striking how much and how fast that is changing.
He is finishing out his term as a shepherd in our church…BOOM! huge change.
New next door neighbors. The kind that broke into a boarded up house,smoking crack, acting crazy (some believing themselves to be aliens from another planet), causing us to be more vigilant than usual. BOOM! change.
My husband is home way more. I do most of the driving. Doctors appointments and blood draws are constant. We have “older” children….need I say more? BOOM! major change.
How do I, as a wife, mother, servant, neighbor, friend, adorn the gospel in such a way that Christ is made much of in the midst of several major changes at once? When his limitations and my limitations are so clear? When weakness and need are all that seems to exist at this moment and time?
Remember my God who has no limits.
Then, BOOM! live!
Love (Philos) my husband.
Intentionally develop affection and friendship and intimacy in every way I can as unto the Lord.
Drive him to appointments gladly for the Lord.
Pray for him consistently.
Hold him tight as often as possible.
Help him serve others in our church and in our hood. (Even if it doesn’t look like it has in the past).
Encourage him as a father.
Love (Philos) my children.
Cultivate faithful tenderness in my words to them.
Spend time laughing with them.
Work alongside them.
Correct them with the Word.
Confess sin to them.
Bring them in on some of our plans.
Keep teaching them even when I think they aren’t hearing it.
Serve my church in whatever way possible.
Keep our table open.
Come alongside the mission and vision whenever and wherever we possibly can-together.
Hope all things.
Believe all things.
Keep lovin’ our neighbors.
Visits have been a little less frequent, but we are committed to neighboring with gospel intentionality. With my husband’s new limitations and frequency at home we can possibly do more together!
I must live as one who has received this from the very hand of God-because I have. Our limits and weakness are set by him and with them we must be content and find our happiness and worth in him alone!
It is a fight of faith to rest in His goodness- so we fight. We rest in His strength and boast in our weakness to make much of Him!